Evil Genie Game

[Philly]

Copied this from the CTV game board. Let your imaginatin soar:



The idea is basically that poster A asks the evil genie to grant a wish.
Poster * grants the wish, then makes one of his/her own.
Of course there is a catch

The genie always grants the wish, but with an evil twist

Example

Post A - I wish it would rain today
---------------------------------------

Post * - Granted, but it rains so much, your house is washed away, and you end up living under a bridge.

I wish I had a million dollars

[LiveLaughLuv]

Post * - Granted, but it rains so much, your house is washed away, and you end up living under a bridge.

I wish I had a million dollars

Granted, but with that million dollars you will loose your happiness.

I wish I could foresee the future

[DDD]

Post * - Granted, but it rains so much, your house is washed away, and you end up living under a bridge.

I wish I had a million dollars

Granted, but with that million dollars you will loose your happiness.

I wish I could foresee the future

Granted but what you foresee is so horrible that you want to end it all now!

I wish I had next week off from work!

[Kenobicat]

I wish I had next week off from work

Granted, but your house will get dirty and you'll have to spend it cleaning.

I wish I could live on the beach.

[look4u]

I wish I could live on the beach.

Granted you can live on the beach , but you’re going gets and in your everything.

I want the wisdom to move an immovable object.

[Philly]

I wish I could live on the beach.

Granted you can live on the beach , but you’re going gets and in your everything.

I want the wisdom to move an immovable object.


Granted, but now you move "all" immovable objects just by looking at them. Your furniture moves away before you sit on it, you can't cook anything because your pots and pans won't stay in one place. Your "wisdom" went a little overboard.


I wish all the foods that taste so good, wouldn't be bad for you.

[PatC]

I wish I could live on the beach.

Granted you can live on the beach , but you’re going gets and in your everything.

I want the wisdom to move an immovable object.

Granted, you have the wisdom to move an immovable object, but you become dull as a stick and lose all your friends.

I want to be slender again like I was when I was 25.

[look4u]

Granted, you have the wisdom to move an immovable object, but you become dull as a stick and lose all your friends.

I want to be slender again like I was when I was 25.


Granted, but all the clothing in your closet is from when you were ten.

I want the wisdom I have had 55, and the stamina I had had 25.

[Rockdog]

Granted, but all the clothing in your closet is from when you were ten.

I want the wisdom I have had 55, and the stamina I had had 25.

Granted, but who's going to wait on you?

I wish I could sleep.

[look4u]

Granted, but who's going to wait on you?

I wish I could sleep.


Granted Good night, but you still have to get up in the morning . P. S. it is already 2:00 AM

I wish to have a dog with two tails, so he could be twice as happy .

[Phil]

Granted Good night, but you still have to get up in the morning . P. S. it is already 2:00 AM

I wish to have a dog with two tails, so he could be twice as happy .


Granted, but he also has two heads and now he's twice as hungry!


I wish all these fallen leaves in my yard would disappear.

[sciencegirl]

Granted, but he also has two heads and now he's twice as hungry!


I wish all these fallen leaves in my yard would disappear.


I'll grant that wish; but all of the snow that will fall this Winter will fall only in your yard.

I wish Summer was all year round.

[Philly]

Granted, but he also has two heads and now he's twice as hungry!


I wish all these fallen leaves in my yard would disappear.


Granted, but now all the trees are gone also, so there will be no birds in spring to brighten your days.


I wish all the foods that tasted so good weren't bad for you.

[mood*ring]

Granted, but now all the trees are gone also, so there will be no birds in spring to brighten your days.


I wish all the foods that tasted so good weren't bad for you.


granted but you have developed an allergy to anything that tastes good.

I wish that the person that works with me would work for a change.

[PMSPrincess]

granted but you have developed an allergy to anything that tastes good.

I wish that the person that works with me would work for a change.

Granted but the work done by "the evil darkness of being" turns out to be so horribly wrong and you have to re-do it all, by yourself.....:71526:

I wish that I could make my child's father realize just how much work goes into raising a child ALONE, without his help

[mood*ring]

Granted but the work done by "the evil darkness of being" turns out to be so horribly wrong and you have to re-do it all, by yourself.....:71526:

I wish that I could make my child's father realize just how much work goes into raising a child ALONE, without his help

granted, but he sees how good of a job you are doing and decides not to help out.

I wish I had the money tobuy everyone here a christmas present.

[look4u]

granted, but he sees how good of a job you are doing and decides not to help out.

I wish I had the money tobuy everyone here a christmas present.

Wish granted, but you lose everyone’s mailing address and you don’t have any room to move inside your home.

I wish I could send a spill proof, never emptying glass of Christmas cheer to everyone here.

[mood*ring]

Wish granted, but you lose everyone’s mailing address and you don’t have any room to move inside your home.

I wish I could send a spill proof, never emptying glass of Christmas cheer to everyone here.


granted - but the Christmas cheer in July is irritating to everyone's neighbors and we all get kicked out of our homes and have to move in with you :grin:
(BTW: I call the room with the private bath and the magnificent view).

I wish there were no potholes on the roads.

[look4u]

granted - but the Christmas cheer in July is irritating to everyone's neighbors and we all get kicked out of our homes and have to move in with you :grin:
(BTW: I call the room with the private bath and the magnificent view).

I wish there were no potholes on the roads.

Wish Granted , But now there are no roads , but you still have to make your car payments .

I wish politicians had to tell the truth .

[awakening2lite]

Granted Good night, but you still have to get up in the morning . P. S. it is already 2:00 AM

I wish to have a dog with two tails, so he could be twice as happy .


Granted, but he also has two heads, so he's twice as yappy!

I wish to have a day without detoured plans.

[look4u]

Granted, but he also has two heads, so he's twice as yappy!

I wish to have a day without detoured plans.

I'm sorry you quoted the wrong which , this was the last wish that you needed to quote .

Wish Granted , But now there are no roads , but you still have to make your car payments .

I wish politicians had to tell the truth .

[mood*ring]

I'm sorry you quoted the wrong which , this was the last wish that you needed to quote .

Wish Granted , But now there are no roads , but you still have to make your car payments .

I wish politicians had to tell the truth .


granted but now there is no one to vote for.

I wish that my winter will be a mild one.

[cbhope]

granted but now there is no one to vote for.

I wish that my winter will be a mild one.

Granted but the birds will not go south for the winter and you will be cleaning extra bird poop off of your car.

I wish I could be Queen for a day.

[awakening2lite]

Granted but the birds will not go south for the winter and you will be cleaning extra bird poop off of your car.

I wish I could be Queen for a day.


Granted, but you have to accept the magtag washer.

I wish I could be in two places at once.

[Firehead]

Granted, but you have to accept the magtag washer.

I wish I could be in two places at once.


Granted but sorry that one place was in the mouth of a shark and the other place was being a moderator on a message board (:D)

I wish I could bowl a perfect 300 at Nationals.

[mood*ring]

I wish I could bowl a perfect 300 at Nationals.

granted, unfortunately you were at the National spelling bee and 300 wasn't the perfect score.

I wish I had more chips and dip in my house

[cbhope]

granted, unfortunately you were at the National spelling bee and 300 wasn't the perfect score.

I wish I had more chips and dip in my house

Granted but they weren't packaged and you have to clean up the mess

I wish I could lose 20 pounds

[Rockdog]

Granted but they weren't packaged and you have to clean up the mess

I wish I could lose 20 pounds

Granted but now you look like Nicole Richie

I wish winter was over!

[Firehead]

Granted but now you look like Nicole Richie

I wish winter was over!

Granted but now the monsoon season hits you.

I wish my hair was straight.

[mood*ring]

Granted but now the monsoon season hits you.

I wish my hair was straight.

granted it is now straight up in the air.

I wish my electric bill would go down

[cbhope]

granted it is now straight up in the air.

I wish my electric bill would go down

Granted but your water bill skyrockets

I wish I wasn't so tired.

[Passions]

Granted but your water bill skyrockets

I wish I wasn't so tired.

Granted but now you have sleepless nights.

I wish I 40 again.

[mood*ring]

Granted but now you have sleepless nights.

I wish I 40 again.

granted you are Interstate 40 (I 40). :kidding-01:

granted you are 40 again but with the body and health you have now.

I wish goldfish could talk.

[SWFlorida]

granted you are Interstate 40 (I 40). :kidding-01:

granted you are 40 again but with the body and health you have now.

I wish goldfish could talk.
Granted, but they whine all day and all night about the Guppies and never shut up.

I wish I could take a cruise.

[Passions]

Granted, but they whine all day and all night about the Guppies and never shut up.

I wish I could take a cruise.

granted you are now aboard a rubber raft in a river heading south.

I wish I had a horse.

[Firehead]

granted you are now aboard a rubber raft in a river heading south.

I wish I had a horse.

Granted but the horse is 20 years old and all it does is eats.

I wish I could own a log cabin home.

[Passions]

Granted but the horse is 20 years old and all it does is eats.

I wish I could own a log cabin home.

Granted but your log cabin has a dirt floor and no windows.

I wish all the leaves were raked.

[SavannahStar]

Granted but your log cabin has a dirt floor and no windows.

I wish all the leaves were raked.

Granted but they are raked into your living room.

I wish I had ceramic tile flooring.

[mood*ring]

Granted but they are raked into your living room.

I wish I had ceramic tile flooring.

granted but its slick and you are constantly falling

I wish I could go to the moon

[Passions]

granted but its slick and you are constantly falling

I wish I could go to the moon

Granted to the MOON you go on a one way trip. :kidding-01:

I wish I had a new kitchen.

[mood*ring]

Granted to the MOON you go on a one way trip. :kidding-01:

I wish I had a new kitchen.


granted, you are the proud owner of a mattel play kitchen complete with pink plastic stove, pink plastic refrigerator, pink plastic sink, and pink plastic diswasher.

I wish I would get a raise.

[PMSPrincess]

granted, you are the proud owner of a mattel play kitchen complete with pink plastic stove, pink plastic refrigerator, pink plastic sink, and pink plastic diswasher.

I wish I would get a raise.

Granted, but it comes in the form of a 3 foot step ladder :kidding-01:

I wish for all my shopping to be DONE!

[look4u]

Granted, but it comes in the form of a 3 foot step ladder :kidding-01:

I wish for all my shopping to be DONE!


Granted, all your shopping is done, but everything is wrong and you lost the receipts.

I wish this headache would go away.

[SavannahStar]

Granted, all your shopping is done, but everything is wrong and you lost the receipts.

I wish this headache would go away.


Granted. Your headache is all gone but now you have a toothache. In fact your tooth is abcessed and you have a swollen jaw and can't eat or even talk you are in such pain.

I wish I had all of next week off work.

[look4u]

Granted. Your headache is all gone but now you have a toothache. In fact your tooth is abcessed and you have a swollen jaw and can't eat or even talk you are in such pain.

I wish I had all of next week off work.

Your wish is granted . But in the words of the Donald , you're fired ! And your new job doesn't start until January 15 . that's not to evil , three weeks off and a new job .

I wish I had SavannahStars vacation time .

[Passions]

Your wish is granted . But in the words of the Donald , you're fired ! And your new job doesn't start until January 15 . that's not to evil , three weeks off and a new job .

I wish I had SavannahStars vacation time .

Granted you have the same time off as SavannahStars. How ever you must stay home.

I wish it would rain.

[cbhope]

Granted you have the same time off as SavannahStars. How ever you must stay home.

I wish it would rain.

Granted but it wouldn't stop raining so now there are floods everywhere.

I wish I had all my Christmas cooking done.

[Passions]

Granted but it wouldn't stop raining so now there are floods everywhere.

I wish I had all my Christmas cooking done.

Granted all your cooking is done. The dishwasher is acting up and the repairman can't get to your house for another 3 weeks.

I wish I had all the present wrapped.

[SavannahStar]

Granted all your cooking is done. The dishwasher is acting up and the repairman can't get to your house for another 3 weeks.

I wish I had all the present wrapped.

Granted! All your presents are wrapped. But you forgot gift tags and you can't remember what is in all the boxes or who they are for.

I wish my whole house was repainted.

[Firehead]

Granted! All your presents are wrapped. But you forgot gift tags and you can't remember what is in all the boxes or who they are for.

I wish my whole house was repainted.

Granted but the house was finger painted by children.

I wish I could sing like a bird.

[7pcSuit]

I wish I could sing like a bird.Wish granted. CAW! CAW! CAW! CAW! :a1chic:

I wish there really was a Santa...

[Passions]

Wish granted. CAW! CAW! CAW! CAW! :a1chic:

I wish there really was a Santa...

Wish granted Santa is in everyones hearts, just ask a young child.

I wish the neighbors dog would stop barking.

[Firehead]

Wish granted Santa is in everyones hearts, just ask a young child.

I wish the neighbors dog would stop barking.

Wish granted but now all the dog does is howl.


I wish I didn't have to make dinner.

[Texas53]

Wish granted but now all the dog does is howl.


I wish I didn't have to make dinner.

Wish granted. The family made dinner reservations but the restaurant is closed due to a bad health inspection.

I wish I would win the lottery.

[PatC]

Wish granted. The family made dinner reservations but the restaurant is closed due to a bad health inspection.

I wish I would win the lottery.


Granted but everyone you ever knew and every relative you have lines up to borrow money.

I wish I could fly an airplane.

[Texas53]

Granted but everyone you ever knew and every relative you have lines up to borrow money.

I wish I could fly an airplane.

Wish granted, however, all planes of any type have been grounded and the instructors have quit.

I wish I never had to worry about anything ever again.

[PatC]

Wish granted, however, all planes of any type have been grounded and the instructors have quit.

I wish I never had to worry about anything ever again.

Wish granted, but the deep coma you're in distresses your family.

I wish I could go on vacation for a month.

[Passions]

Wish granted, but the deep coma you're in distresses your family.

I wish I could go on vacation for a month.

Wish granted, but you can only take one suitcase and no carry ons.

I wish the neighbors would turn off their xmas lights during the day.

[look4u]

Wish granted, but you can only take one suitcase and no carry ons.

I wish the neighbors would turn off their xmas lights during the day.

Your wishe is granted. They turned off their lights yesterday but couldn’t get them started up last night, so they stole yours.

I wish my dogs could speak to me in English and tell me when they need to go out.

[PatC]

Your wishe is granted. They turned off their lights yesterday but couldn’t get them started up last night, so they stole yours.

I wish my dogs could speak to me in English and tell me when they need to go out.


Granted but now you can understand EVERYTHING THEY SAY.

I wish I had a chocolate ice cream sundae with whipped cream and a cherry on top.

[look4u]

Granted but now you can understand EVERYTHING THEY SAY.

I wish I had a chocolate ice cream sundae with whipped cream and a cherry on top.

Your wish is granted, but you have a toothache and it just melts away.

I hope the Giants beat the Patriots.

[PatC]

Your wish is granted, but you have a toothache and it just melts away.

I hope the Giants beat the Patriots.

Granted but your TV signal is lost and you can't find out for two days.

I wish my car was a new one.

[look4u]

Granted but your TV signal is lost and you can't find out for two days.

I wish my car was a new one.

Your wish is granted , But you're new car was stolen and it's somewhere in Baghdad today .

I wish someone would steal my old truck .

[SavannahStar]

Your wish is granted , But you're new car was stolen and it's somewhere in Baghdad today .

I wish someone would steal my old truck .

Granted, but they also stole everything in your house.

I wish today was Saturday instead of Sunday.

[Kel]

Granted, but they also stole everything in your house.

I wish today was Saturday instead of Sunday.


Your wish is granted but you still have to go to work tomorrow.

I wish my Christmas tree was already taken down.

[look4u]

Your wish is granted but you still have to go to work tomorrow.

I wish my Christmas tree was already taken down.
Your wish is granted , but you forgot it was in the driveway for pickup and you ran it over and got a flat tire .

I wish I had fresh vegetables from my garden .

[Kel]

Your wish is granted , but you forgot it was in the driveway for pickup and you ran it over and got a flat tire .

I wish I had fresh vegetables from my garden .

Your wish is granted but there was a massive pest infestation and the vegetables are inedible.

I wish my dishwasher would load itself!

[Philly]

Your wish is granted but there was a massive pest infestation and the vegetables are inedible.

I wish my dishwasher would load itself!


Granted, but all your dishes are broken because the dishwasher throws the dishes any which way. Now you need to buy more dinnerware.


I wish my dog wasn't so yappy.

[mood*ring]

I wish my dog wasn't so yappy.

granted. now he just whines 24/7.

I wish the winter temps would be mild this year.

[look4u]

granted. now he just whines 24/7.

I wish the winter temps would be mild this year.


Your wish is granted, but because of the warmer temperatures there is less snowpack this year causing water restrictions next summer.

I wish it was easier to quit smoking

[Tracian]

Your wish is granted, but because of the warmer temperatures there is less snowpack this year causing water restrictions next summer.

I wish it was easier to quit smoking


Your wish is granted but now since you quit smoking your eating every chocolate coated item in sight.

I wish I had knowledge of all the new tax laws and loopholes.

[look4u]

Your wish is granted but now since you quit smoking your eating every chocolate coated item in sight.

I wish I had knowledge of all the new tax laws and loopholes.
Your wish is granted , but along with your knowledge comes a desire to be fair , so you end up paying twice as much in taxes .

I wish the falling snow would reverse its direction and go up after it has fallen .

[SavannahStar]

Your wish is granted , but along with your knowledge comes a desire to be fair , so you end up paying twice as much in taxes .

I wish the falling snow would reverse its direction and go up after it has fallen .

Granted but it takes all the grass and other vegetation with it, leaving sandy dirt/mud, and it will take 3 years for anything to grow again.

I wish I had thick curly hair.

[Philly]

Your wish is granted, but because of the warmer temperatures there is less snowpack this year causing water restrictions next summer.

I wish it was easier to quit smoking

I'm on my 6th day of taking Chantix. I have been a heavy smoker my entire adult life and I haven't had a cigarette in two days. You might want to ask your doctor for a prescription.

BACK TO THE GAME

You were able to stop smoking just wishing it, however now all you do is exercise since you can breathe easier. You have spent all your savings on gyms, exercise equipment, yoga classes and sportswear. You can't pay your mortgage - but you fee alot better.


I wish I was a better cook.

[look4u]

granted you have curly hair everywhere , the curly hair from your eyebrows and your eyelashes gets stuck together like Velcro and you cant shut your eyes .

And granted you're a better cook , but every homeless person comes to your door 24 hours a day and you can't get any sleep or anything else done .

I wish my computer had a timer on it to tell me when to get up and leave . LOL

[Passions]

granted you have curly hair everywhere , the curly hair from your eyebrows and your eyelashes gets stuck together like Velcro and you cant shut your eyes .

And granted you're a better cook , but every homeless person comes to your door 24 hours a day and you can't get any sleep or anything else done .

I wish my computer had a timer on it to tell me when to get up and leave . LOL

Granted the computer will turn off after 12hrs. and your chair will fall a part, the phone will ring, the door bell will ring, and you just leave.

I wish my dust would disappear.

[look4u]

Granted the computer will turn off after 12hrs. and your chair will fall a part, the phone will ring, the door bell will ring, and you just leave.

I wish my dust would disappear.

your wish it is granted , but when it disappears you notice all the scratches on your furniture that the dust was hiding so you have to buy all new furniture .

I wish my ice cubes would stop melting .

[look4u]

Bump

[Firehead]

your wish it is granted , but when it disappears you notice all the scratches on your furniture that the dust was hiding so you have to buy all new furniture .

I wish my ice cubes would stop melting .

You wish is granted but now you see a bug frozen in it.


I wish that I didn't have to take down the christmas tree.

[Kel]

You wish is granted but now you see a bug frozen in it.


I wish that I didn't have to take down the christmas tree.

Your wish is granted but the tree has now taken root in your living room and you must decorate it for every holiday of the year.

I wish I could take a nap.

[sanneke]

Your wish is granted but the tree has now taken root in your living room and you must decorate it for every holiday of the year.

I wish I could take a nap.



Wish granted, you'll wake up feeling worse than you felt before your nap.


I wish for a blue moon

[look4u]

Wish granted, you'll wake up feeling worse than you felt before your nap.


I wish for a blue moon
your wish is granted , but it's so overcast you can't see it .

I wish my car didn't needed an oil change .

[Firehead]

your wish is granted , but it's so overcast you can't see it .

I wish my car didn't needed an oil change .

Your wish it granted. The engine blew up and has to be replaced.

I wish that I didn't have to shovel the driveway.

[Tracian]

Your wish it granted. The engine blew up and has to be replaced.

I wish that I didn't have to shovel the driveway.


Your wish is granted, your car was stolen.

I wish I didn't have to weed the garden.

[sanneke]

Your wish is granted, your car was stolen.

I wish I didn't have to weed the garden.



Wish granted, no spring nor summer, for you, nor any beautiful flowers.


I wish my neighbors dog would stop barking.

[SavannahStar]

Wish granted, no spring nor summer, for you, nor any beautiful flowers.


I wish my neighbors dog would stop barking.

Granted! Dog is quiet now. But the neighbors bought 52 roosters for their backyard and they all wake up at 4:30 a.m. on the dot with "****-a-doodle-dooooooooooooooooo." :girl_haha:

I wish I didn't have this blasted cold all of a sudden. :1187603408.CR.Mothe

[sanneke]

Granted! Dog is quiet now. But the neighbors bought 52 roosters for their backyard and they all wake up at 4:30 a.m. on the dot with "****-a-doodle-dooooooooooooooooo." :girl_haha:

I wish I didn't have this blasted cold all of a sudden. :1187603408.CR.Mothe



LOL

Granted, tomorrow you'll feel better, and on top of that lost 10lbs. because of your cold.

I wish I was on the beach right now.

[Passions]

LOL

Granted, tomorrow you'll feel better, and on top of that lost 10lbs. because of your cold.

I wish I was on the beach right now.

Granted, but the tide is coming in faster than you came move and your things are floating in the water.

I wish I could think of something.

[sanneke]

Granted, but the tide is coming in faster than you came move and your things are floating in the water.

I wish I could think of something.


Granted, once you do it's too late.........

I wish I did not have to cook tonight.

[SavannahStar]

Granted, once you do it's too late.........

I wish I did not have to cook tonight.

Granted. But there was a short in your electrical system and your stove, toaster, microwave, fridge and dishwasher all blew up. You need to call your homeowners insurance co. ASAP. THEN you can go out to dinner. In fact, you won't be cooking again for MANY nights.

I wish I had thick, wavy hair.

[sanneke]

Granted. But there was a short in your electrical system and your stove, toaster, microwave, fridge and dishwasher all blew up. You need to call your homeowners insurance co. ASAP. THEN you can go out to dinner. In fact, you won't be cooking again for MANY nights.

I wish I had thick, wavy hair.


Granted, I have thick, curly wavy hair, and it's driving me crazy, it never looks the same from day to day, my hairdresser always insist on drying it straight, and it looks fabulous, then I wash it and it look as if I stuck my finger in the electrical socket, then I can't cook because it made all the sockets in my house blow up, and we have to eat out, and it gets old, so from now on you get to deal with my hair.

I wish my cat would let me brush her.

[Passions]

Granted, I have thick, curly wavy hair, and it's driving me crazy, it never looks the same from day to day, my hairdresser always insist on drying it straight, and it looks fabulous, then I wash it and it look as if I stuck my finger in the electrical socket, then I can't cook because it made all the sockets in my house blow up, and we have to eat out, and it gets old, so from now on you get to deal with my hair.

I wish my cat would let me brush her.

Granted the cat stayed nice, but you combed all the hair off its tail.
Wish I had better luck with cats.

[look4u]

Granted the cat stayed nice, but you combed all the hair off its tail.
Wish I had better luck with cats.
Granted you have great luck with cats and every cat for miles knows it and comes to your house. Thousands of cats have made the pilgrimage to your house and your neighbors think you are the crazy cat person.

I wish I owned affordable rental property.

[Kel]

Granted you have great luck with cats and every cat for miles knows it and comes to your house. Thousands of cats have made the pilgrimage to your house and your neighbors think you are the crazy cat person.

I wish I owned affordable rental property.

Granted. Your rental property is affordable but your renters keep skipping out on the rent.

I wish I had a housekeeper!

[Passions]

Granted. Your rental property is affordable but your renters keep skipping out on the rent.

I wish I had a housekeeper!

Granted you now have this male housekeeper. He follows you all around the house to make sure you keep things neat.

I wish the roses were already prunned

[Claudia]

Granted you now have this male housekeeper. He follows you all around the house to make sure you keep things neat.

I wish the roses were already prunned

Granted, your roses are pruned, but they were done by your mean neighbor who hacked them down to the ground.

I wish these kids I watch could behave for more than 5 minutes at a time.

[Claudia]

So, you guys can't figure out a way to make them behave either, huh?

*sigh*

[Texas53]

Granted, your roses are pruned, but they were done by your mean neighbor who hacked them down to the ground.

I wish these kids I watch could behave for more than 5 minutes at a time.

You finally figured out how to make the kids behave longer, but then realized they weren't your kids!

I wish I could win a huge lottery.

[Claudia]

You finally figured out how to make the kids behave longer, but then realized they weren't your kids!

I wish I could win a huge lottery.

Granted. You won the lottery, but the IRS took most of it in back taxes, and long lost relatives took the rest.


I wish we would get some snow around here!!!

[Kel]

Granted. You won the lottery, but the IRS took most of it in back taxes, and long lost relatives took the rest.


I wish we would get some snow around here!!!

Granted but now you are snowed in with those ill-behaved children!!

I wish I didn't have to commute so far to work!

[Claudia]

Granted but now you are snowed in with those ill-behaved children!!

I wish I didn't have to commute so far to work!

Oh, eek. That's a horrible thought!!!

Granted. You no longer have to commute so far to work, but it's because you just got fired.


I wish my son didn't have such a smart mouth!

[Firehead]

Oh, eek. That's a horrible thought!!!

Granted. You no longer have to commute so far to work, but it's because you just got fired.


I wish my son didn't have such a smart mouth!

Granted but now all he does is sing a song about some bear going over the mountain.

I wish that I could keep up with the dust in this house.

[StoneFox]

Granted but now all he does is sing a song about some bear going over the mountain.

I wish that I could keep up with the dust in this house.

Granted, but now you have nothing in your house to collect dust.


I wish it would stop snowing.

[look4u]

Granted, but now you have nothing in your house to collect dust.


I wish it would stop snowing.

granted it's the end of March , and all you see is the mud round your house .

I wish I had a time machine to finish the house remodeling .

[Claudia]

granted it's the end of March , and all you see is the mud round your house .

I wish I had a time machine to finish the house remodeling .

Granted, but you trip up, fall inside the time machine, and are whisked back to the age of dinosaurs. You narrowly escape being crushed when a T-Rex stomped the machine into bits, leaving you stuck there forever.
http://bestsmileys.com/dinosours/2.gif


I wish it would stop raining so I can go to the Daffodil Festival.

[look4u]

Granted, but you trip up, fall inside the time machine, and are whisked back to the age of dinosaurs. You narrowly escape being crushed when a T-Rex stomped the machine into bits, leaving you stuck there forever.

I wish it would stop raining so I can go to the Daffodil Festival.

Your wish is granted, the sun has come out and is shining brightly, over 110°, unfortunately it has caused all of the daffodils to wilt.

I wish my shop would clean itself.

[PatC]

I wish my shop would clean itself.

Granted, however next time you start in the shop your are run over by an out of control Roomba.

I wish my son would become independently wealthy.

[Tracian]

Granted, however next time you start in the shop your are run over by an out of control Roomba.

I wish my son would become independently wealthy.



Granted, however, he sticks you in a bargin basement rest home.


I wish my cat would stop clawing the couch.

[look4u]

Granted, however, he sticks you in a bargin basement rest home.


I wish my cat would stop clawing the couch.granted he just moves to something more valuable .
I wish my cigarette lighter would not run out of lighter fluid .

[Tracian]

granted he just moves to something more valuable .
I wish my cigarette lighter would not run out of lighter fluid .


Granted, but now it will not turn off.


I wish that I could come up with a clever wish

[look4u]

Granted, but now it will not turn off.


I wish that I could come up with a clever wishgranted , you won the lottery , you get to keep it all , you live a long long life , you are a well respected citizen , then you wake up it's all been a dream .

I hope I never have that kind of luck .

[Tracian]

granted , you won the lottery , you get to keep it all , you live a long long life , you are a well respected citizen , then you wake up it's all been a dream .

I hope I never have that kind of luck .


That is MY KIND OF LUCK!!!!!



:faintTHUD:

[KellBell]

Granted, but now it will not turn off.


I wish that I could come up with a clever wish

You came up with a clever wish, you wished for happiness.... but all others around you were not happy.



I wish my house could clean itself!

[look4u]

You came up with a clever wish, you wished for happiness.... but all others around you were not happy.



I wish my house could clean itself!
Granted your house cleans itself . The unfortunate part is that it has a built in system to keep it from getting dirty , and it won't let you in .

I wish my dogs would wipe their muddy feet when they come in from the yard .

[pijody]

Granted your house cleans itself . The unfortunate part is that it has a built in system to keep it from getting dirty , and it won't let you in .

I wish my dogs would wipe their muddy feet when they come in from the yard .

Granted, but they use a clean towel everytime.


I wish I could pay all of our bills off today

[look4u]

Granted, but they use a clean towel everytime.


I wish I could pay all of our bills off today

Granted all your bills are paid , you have free and clear title to everything , unfortunately your entire property just vanished into a sinkhole .

I wish my ex wife lived near a sinkhole .

[KellBell]

Granted all your bills are paid , you have free and clear title to everything , unfortunately your entire property just vanished into a sinkhole .

I wish my ex wife lived near a sinkhole .

Your ex wife lives near a sinkhole, right next door to you... you sink too!

I wish to know all the answers.

[Claudia]

Your ex wife lives near a sinkhole, right next door to you... you sink too!

I wish to know all the answers.

You now know all the answers, but you have no peace because everyone is asking you questions 24/7.


I wish my son wouldn't play video games so much!

[Dina_Dayel]

You now know all the answers, but you have no peace because everyone is asking you questions 24/7.


I wish my son wouldn't play video games so much!

Granted . Your son has lost interest in video games and discovered girls : and you don't like the one he's spending all his time with : She'll be a real BRIDEZILLA , too . Enjoy .

I wish I had a cleaning / cooking person .

[look4u]

Granted . Your son has lost interest in video games and discovered girls : and you don't like the one he's spending all his time with : She'll be a real BRIDEZILLA , too . Enjoy .

I wish I had a cleaning / cooking person .

Granted, you now have a CHEFhttp://bestsmileys.com/cooking/6.gif and a BUTLER.http://bestsmileys.com/cleaning/9.gif Unfortunately they are both blind and deaf. They’ve broken everything in your house and set the kitchen on fire. http://bestsmileys.com/fire/1.gif

I wish my dogs could bath themselves.
http://bestsmileys.com/dogs/2.gif

[Dina_Dayel]

Granted, you now have a CHEFhttp://bestsmileys.com/cooking/6.gif and a BUTLER.http://bestsmileys.com/cleaning/9.gif Unfortunately they are both blind and deaf. They’ve broken everything in your house and set the kitchen on fire. http://bestsmileys.com/fire/1.gif

I wish my dogs could bath themselves.
http://bestsmileys.com/dogs/2.gif

Granted . Now they want their own
bathroom and accessories from "Bed and
Bath" . They demand fancy dog food .
They won't go in just ANY dog park :
well:
because it smells like a dog park .


I wish I could drive .

[Dina_Dayel]

Granted, you now have a CHEFhttp://bestsmileys.com/cooking/6.gif and a BUTLER.http://bestsmileys.com/cleaning/9.gif Unfortunately they are both blind and deaf. They’ve broken everything in your house and set the kitchen on fire. http://bestsmileys.com/fire/1.gif

I wish my dogs could bath themselves.
http://bestsmileys.com/dogs/2.gif

I've already had that hired help
in my kitchen .
Thank you so much .


Your dogs won't go in just any Bath .
They want a Jacuzzi and Hot-Tub .
You will have to move .

I wish I could drive .

[look4u]

I've already had that hired help
in my kitchen .
Thank you so much .


Your dogs won't go in just any Bath .
They want a Jacuzzi and Hot-Tub .
You will have to move .

I wish I could drive .

Granted you can drive but you gotta pay the gas bill, enough said
http://bestsmileys.com/cars/8.gif
I wish I had my own Oil well
http://bestsmileys.com/umbrellas/1.gif

[Dina_Dayel]

Granted you can drive but you gotta pay the gas bill, enough said
http://bestsmileys.com/cars/8.gif
I wish I had my own Oil well
http://bestsmileys.com/umbrellas/1.gif

Granted : But you are only losing money :
Thieves come and syphon off oil from you so you had to hire armed guards .


I wish I could go on "Deal Or No Deal "
and go home with the mill$$$ .

[look4u]

Granted : But you are only losing money :
Thieves come and syphon off oil from you so you had to hire armed guards .


I wish I could go on "Deal Or No Deal "
and go home with the mill$$$ .

Your wish is granted, you win a million dollars but the tax man takes an awful lot of it.

I wish I had a magic Hollywood wallet that had money in it every time I open it.
http://bestsmileys.com/money/2.gif

[Silent Ears]

Your wish is granted, you win a million dollars but the tax man takes an awful lot of it.

I wish I had a magic Hollywood wallet that had money in it every time I open it.
http://bestsmileys.com/money/2.gif

Granted....But...The minute you fold your billfold up again it is empty and dry.

I wished I had a new Kitty:0012:

[Phil]

Granted....But...The minute you fold your billfold up again it is empty and dry.

I wished I had a new Kitty:0012:

Granted, she looks cute, but she's really EVIL....


http://i257.photobucket.com/albums/hh236/Gwen4Gwen/evil-kitty.gif


I wish we'd get more rain!

[Dina_Dayel]

Granted, she looks cute, but she's really EVIL....


http://i257.photobucket.com/albums/hh236/Gwen4Gwen/evil-kitty.gif
Heck : That cat is too scarey
I wish we'd get more rain!

You want to live in Iowa ?
Granted . People wll notice you every four years .

I wish I had a country home .

[PatC]

You want to live in Iowa ?
Granted . People wll notice you every four years .

I wish I had a country home .

Granted you have a country home. Now you have two acres to mow and weed whack while batting away the flys and mosquitos, AND, you have the odor of the hog farm down the road when the wind is from the west (which it usually is) so you can't really enjoy sitting on your patio most evenings.


I wish I lived in a brand new condo.

[Silent Ears]

Granted you have a country home. Now you have two acres to mow and weed whack while batting away the flys and mosquitos, AND, you have the odor of the hog farm down the road when the wind is from the west (which it usually is) so you can't really enjoy sitting on your patio most evenings.


I wish I lived in a brand new condo.
Granted.....But it has no windows and infested with fleas and Birds.And it is hard to prove ownership since a homeless person already moved in and has the same name as you.

I wished I was skinny again. :happy0158:

[PatC]

me too

[Silent Ears]

me too
Granted....But....Now you have no cloths to fit no more.

i wished I had a car that got good gas milage.

[Silent Ears]

Granted....But....Now you have no cloths to fit no more.

i wished I had a car that got good gas milage.
Granted....But now it needs tires

I widh I had a new house

[Phil]

Granted....But now it needs tires

I wish I had a new house

Granted, but the mortgage payment is so high, you'll need a second job to pay it!

I wish I had a new driveway.

[Silent Ears]

Granted, but the mortgage payment is so high, you'll need a second job to pay it!

I wish I had a new driveway.
Granted...But...The neighbors are constantly blocking your new driveway
and you still have to walk to your house.
I wished I had a new pair of shoes

[SavannahStar]

Granted...But...The neighbors are constantly blocking your new driveway
and you still have to walk to your house.
I wished I had a new pair of shoes

Granted..but they don't fit. You try to squeeze your feet into them but you get bunions and have to get them surgically removed.

I wish I could be 35 again.

[Silent Ears]

Granted..but they don't fit. You try to squeeze your feet into them but you get bunions and have to get them surgically removed.

I wish I could be 35 again.
Granted,but... the cost of everything has doubled and it takes more to stay 35 and looking good.

I wished it was cold out side again.

[Dina_Dayel]

Granted,but... the cost of everything has doubled and it takes more to stay 35 and looking good.

I wished it was cold out side again.

Wait a couple of months : it will be .

What are you watching on TV ?

[Silent Ears]

Wait a couple of months : it will be .

What are you watching on TV ?
Hummmmmmm? I'm lost wrong page
You were to grant a wish and post one you wished for :groan:

[nicky]

Granted,but... the cost of everything has doubled and it takes more to stay 35 and looking good.

I wished it was cold out side again.

Granted.....but it snowed 4 feet and your heater went out.

I wish I would stop killing house plants.

[PatC]

Granted.....but it snowed 4 feet and your heater went out.

I wish I would stop killing house plants.

Granted but the plant grew so large you have no place to put it now.

I wish my knees didn't hurt and I could dance again.

[Silent Ears]

Granted but the plant grew so large you have no place to put it now.

I wish my knees didn't hurt and I could dance again.
Granted your knee no longer hurt and you can dance...but now you have no one to dance with and have to dance alone.

I wished I had a new House

[Philly]

Granted your knee no longer hurt and you can dance...but now you have no one to dance with and have to dance alone.

I wished I had a new House

Granted but your new house is on a remote island which can only be reached by helicopter. You have a heck of a time going food shopping.

I wish the kids would stop skateboarding outside my window.

[Silent Ears]

Granted but your new house is on a remote island which can only be reached by helicopter. You have a heck of a time going food shopping.

I wish the kids would stop skateboarding outside my window.
granted...but... thy are all in your house now.

I wished for a new car that is good on gas

[Philly]

granted...but... thy are all in your house now.

I wished for a new car that is good on gas

Granted but your car is so small, you need to attach a trailer to include your family in it.

I wish no animals should be abused.

[Silent Ears]

Granted but your car is so small, you need to attach a trailer to include your family in it.

I wish no animals should be abused.

Granted....(This one is different)...
the owners were finelly locked up for the abuses they comitted.

I wished I had won the lottery

[KellyO]

Granted....(This one is different)...
the owners were finelly locked up for the abuses they comitted.

I wished I had won the lottery


granted...you won the lottery but lost the ticket. :frown:

I wish I had a giant ice cream sundae.

[Philly]

granted...you won the lottery but lost the ticket. :frown:

I wish I had a giant ice cream sundae.

Granted but now you feel guilty and will eat salads for the rest of the year.


I wish I had a large family

[KellyO]

Granted but now you feel guilty and will eat salads for the rest of the year.


I wish I had a large family

Salads? :groan:

Granted....but none of them want to work so you have to support all their lazy butts!

I wish I was going to Hawaii today.

[Silent Ears]

Salads? :groan:

Granted....but none of them want to work so you have to support all their lazy butts!

I wish I was going to Hawaii today.

Granted... But on the plane you lost your wallet with all your money in it and can do nothing but walk around

I wished I had my kids small again

[cavimom]

I wished I had my kids small again

Granted: they are small again but the doctor says its dwarfism disease and they will never grow up again. :sad0119::0doh:

I wish I didn't fear dying

[cavimom]

Granted....but none of them want to work so you have to support all their lazy butts!:0t31::0t31:

[Silent Ears]

Granted....but none of them want to work so you have to support all their lazy butts!:0t31::0t31:

granted..But.. in order to do that you became a pillar of stone and could do nothing no more.

I wished I was a puppy.

[cavimom]

I wished I was a puppy.

Granted ...but now you live in a puppy mill where you share a cement crate with 125 other smelly puppies and sleep in your own poop. Noone ever holds you and you have never walked or played on grass..:1187603408.CR.Mothe

I wish I didn't have panic attacks :1187603408.CR.Mothe

[Silent Ears]

I wished I was a puppy.

Granted ...but now you live in a puppy mill where you share a cement crate with 125 other smelly puppies and sleep in your own poop. Noone ever holds you and you have never walked or played on grass..:1187603408.CR.Mothe

I wish I didn't have panic attacks :1187603408.CR.Mothe

Granted ... you no longer have panic attacks.BUT...
You are now on a pill that is worse than panic attacks..You now have a severe case of Cancer and not expected to get over it.:1187603408.CR.Mothe

I wished it would not rain so much

[SavannahStar]

Granted ... you no longer have panic attacks.BUT...
You are now on a pill that is worse than panic attacks..You now have a severe case of Cancer and not expected to get over it.:1187603408.CR.Mothe

I wished it would not rain so much

Well it rained and your roof leaked. $5,000 to get fixed.

I wish I had curly hair.

[Jess]

Well it rained and your roof leaked. $5,000 to get fixed.

I wish I had curly hair.

Granted! You have curly hair, but only in your armpits.

I wish I had a comfortable chair...

[P.I.Jane]

Granted! You have curly hair, but only in your armpits.

I wish I had a comfortable chair...

You got it! But you can't sit in it because your dog with a urinary tract infection just got out of it.

I would like to try being 15 years old again.

[Jess]

You got it! But you can't sit in it because your dog with a urinary tract infection just got out of it.

I would like to try being 15 years old again.

Granted, you're fifteen years old, but you look like you're sixty.

I wish I had some pringles to eat...

[SavannahStar]

Granted, you're fifteen years old, but you look like you're sixty.

I wish I had some pringles to eat...

You have three pkgs. of pringles. They're stale and not only that, they've been in the pantry and there are a ton of pantry moth eggs in them. :yes2:

I wish the next scratch-off I buy wins $1,000.:022:

[Jess]

You have three pkgs. of pringles. They're stale and not only that, they've been in the pantry and there are a ton of pantry moth eggs in them. :yes2:

I wish the next scratch-off I buy wins $1,000.:022:

EWWWWWWWWWW

Granted, you bought it, but it blows away in the wind and your ex wins it.

I wish my friend would come see me.

[SavannahStar]

EWWWWWWWWWW

Granted, you bought it, but it blows away in the wind and your ex wins it.

I wish my friend would come see me.

Your friend came for a visit and robbed you blind. Some friend, eh?

Sometimes I wish I could go back in time to my childhood. I really loved it.