12-Year-Old Grounded Gets Punishment Overturned in Court

[SaberGal]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,369044,00.html

A Canadian court has overturned a father's punishment for his daughter after she refused to stay off the Internet, his attorney said Wednesday.

The girl, 12, took her father to Quebec Superior Court after he refused to allow her to go on a school trip for chatting on Web sites and then posting "inappropriate" pictures of herself online using a friend's computer, AFP reported.

The punishment was for the girl's "own protection," according to the father's attorney, Kim Beaudoin, who is appealing the ruling.

"She's a child," Beaudoin told AFP. "At her age, children test their limits and it's up to their parent to set boundaries. I started an appeal of the decision today to reestablish parental
authority, and to ensure that this case doesn't set a precedent."

Otherwise, she continued, "Parents are going to be walking on egg shells from now on."

According to court documents, the girl's Internet usage was the latest in a rash of disciplinary problems. But Justice Suzanne Tessier, who was presiding over the case, found the punishment too severe.

I think the whole world has gone insane. JMO

[Roamer]

That is so wrong. :mad:

[Roenick]

So... parents are damned if they do, damned if they don't?

If your child does something and you do nothing, you are a bad parent.
If your child does something, gets punished, takes you to court (rolling eyes) the court tells you you are wrong.

As long as they didn't tie her up and abuse her, how is any punishment 'too harsh'?

[Claudia]

Holy carp. You have GOT to be kidding me. :thud2:

[packy]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,369044,00.html



I think the whole world has gone insane. JMO

Ditto on that.

[LiveLaughLuv]

So... parents are damned if they do, damned if they don't?

If your child does something and you do nothing, you are a bad parent.
If your child does something, gets punished, takes you to court (rolling eyes) the court tells you you are wrong.

As long as they didn't tie her up and abuse her, how is any punishment 'too harsh'?


Yep, your damned if you do and damned if you don't.

See, I have felt for a very long time (I have an empty nest now:happy0158:) the authorites have taken our parental rights away.

The girl, 12, took her father to Quebec Superior Court after he refused to allow her to go on a school trip for chatting on Web sites and then posting "inappropriate" pictures of herself online using a friend's computer, AFP reported.

The punishment was for the girl's "own protection," according to the father's attorney, Kim Beaudoin, who is appealing the ruling.

What part of that seems wrong.

That judge should have sided with the father, at least this dad did something because he cares. He did something because he didn't want this to get out of hand. What happens now if that child meets up with someone she chats with and possibly gets assaulted or worse. Will that judge take the heat? I do hope he wins the appeal.

Well, now he's been humiliated and now this child will do much worse since she feels she can get away with it.

I wonder how she got this case into the court system.

I guess I would have been arrested, after I found out my child posted inappropriate pictures of herself, she'd be lucky just to be grounded. :madranting94dp:

[Roenick]

I want to know how it even got to court. All those times I got grounded from the phone for grades or talking too much in class.... I could've sued!!

[Tam5115]

This is ridiculous! Unless there's abuse going on the courts need to stay out of the parent / child relationship.

Geez, I could have gotten the court to prevent my groundings if I was even one minute late coming home? I could've gotten them to allow me to wear makeup and date before I was 16? Who knew? :thud2:

[Tracian]

And when I have said on other threads that parents are not allowed to parent, some have shot me down, saying it is aways the parent's fault no matter what.

Stupid, ridiculous, lunancy.....

[Details]

This is Canada, not America. Show me that happening here, and I'll be upset - Canada - not my country, and I'd expect a change in law, not to mention judges, is likely to come soon, if the parents of that country feel this was the wrong decision.

[Details]

More information, and a clearer picture, here:
http://www.dose.ca/news/story.html?id=6aaf855a-47e3-4e3f-8709-5b53dcfffff0

There's a divorce, and a custody dispute, the mother wanted to let her go on the trip, the father said no, and that's how it ended up in the courts. This is an unprecedented decision for any court in Canada (I suspect, as well as the world), normally even cases involving physical "maltreatment" (spankings, I suspect) are not intervened in.



If you want a case of one judge making an insane ruling - that, you've got. If you want to say this is proof parents aren't allowed to parent - I don't think so.

[grammybears]

Over the years I have seen how in USA parents are being hounded on their rights as parents. I have seen parents stripped of the powers that they should be to properly to discipline their children. I think there have been changes because of corporal punishment. I just think the authorities have gone too far. Parents should be able to discipline their children as long as warranted and not abusive.
I have seen several people who do not punish their children and then in coming years their children are hellions in society.
Children have to have boundries and guidelines. If these children are not taught respect then they could turn into something volitile later on.

[LiveLaughLuv]

<snippets from article>
"Some pretty severe cases have been acquitted because it was determined that it was the parents' right to decide."

In the few cases where children have taken their parents to court, there's often a history of family conflict, she said. "It's usually not an isolated incident in the family interaction."

Cheryl Milne, a lawyer at the Canadian Foundation for Children, Youth and the Law, said the scenario in the Gatineau case may be unique to Quebec because of its civil code. "I can't imagine a similar case being brought in Ontario."

The father, who is appealing the decision, was "devastated" by the ruling, Beaudoin said. He is refusing to take his daughter back "because he has no authority over her."

I really don't blame the dad in this instance. I think he was undermined by that judge. Momma should have stood by her ex, not create a tug of war!

[Claudia]

<snippets from article>


I really don't blame the dad in this instance. I think he was undermined by that judge. Momma should have stood by her ex, not create a tug of war!

I agree. I don't blame him a bit for not taking her back, at least temporarily. How can you have a child that age under your roof that you cannot discipline? She will go wild on him & he won't be able to do a thing about it, because she won't take him seriously. That is so sad for the father.

[Kami]

This is buggin' the hell out of me. :madranting94dp:

[Tracian]

Okay, I disagree with this in so many ways, it is hard to organise my thoughts, but I am going to try.

First, the judge should have told these parents to work it out without involving the courts. I have some experience with this type of nonsense, because of my husband's exwife:

She would call my husband and insist that he discipline their son, he would support and back her up on any punishment she felt was correct according to their son's actions, IOW, if he was grounded at his mother's house he was grounded when he came to stay with us--but the opposite was not true, if my husband punished him because of some action, she would say 'That is between you and him' and she would go out of her way to do something fun with him, IMO, to spite my husband, which only proved to give this child more power than a child should have.

Second, even with my children that live full time in my home, I have punished them by not letting them participate in some kind of 'fun' activitiy, but did not punish the other kids, for example:

My son was acting up in school, really bad when he was about 10, so I told him if he got in anymore trouble before Halloween (he loved and still does love Halloween) I would not get/or let him wear a costume or go to the activities with his siblings. Well, he screwed up, and though it was really hard on me, he stayed with his grandparents while we took the other kids trick or treating, to the haunted corn maze, etc.

Third, what this girl did was dangerous, and the mother should reconize that her daughter could have very easily become a statistic; instead of fighting her exhusband, she should have either cancelled the trip, or change the time of the trip, if she wanted to be able to spend time with her daughter, sometimes even though it hurts us as parents to take something like that away, it sends a clear message to the child.

Forth, I don't blame the father for not wanting to have the daughter in his home, it is clear that the mother is playing silly games to be the favorite parent, and that will come back and bite her in the butt; sadly, because she is playing this game, the daughter is going to suffer in the long run, because with the mother's attitude, in another couple of years, IMO, this girl may be completely out of control.

Fifth, I strongly believe this is the very thing I have been saying, parents are chastised for trying to set boundries for their children. Now, if the father was being a jerk because the girl didn't eat her veggies, I can see that this would be extreme; but what this 12 year old was doing endangered her, if there are no consequences to this action now, the next time she involves herself in something dangerous, both parents maybe hiring a lawyer, or planning a funeral.

[LiveLaughLuv]

Great post Tracian. You've said it very well. I agree wholeheartedly with everything you've stated! :zm10:


Children will try and manipulate parents, they will always test their boundaries. It is very important to back each other.

The most important factor being, her putting herself in jeopardy with the posting of inappropriate pictures. Class trips are something that should be earned. She definately didn't deserve to go. She tested her waters and now dad has no authority over her, none. It really is a shame because he didn't do it with malice, he is a caring dad, one day she will realize this.

Mom deserves to put up with her antics for awhile. I'll bet she will regret the day she got dad's punishment overturned.